Childcare Update and a Rough Night

First of all let me say I appreciate all the advice and support on my childcare situation. I haven't found anything yet but since I've made the decision I've been able to think about things a little more. And nights like the last two nights have me leaning more towards finding something sooner rather than later and just paying for childcare instead of trying to find someone to swap with. I'm so tired it's ridiculous. I fell asleep while rocking Brody to sleep last night then woke back up at 11:30 at night and tried to drink some coffee to wake up and get a job finished. Didn't go so well so I'll be at it again tonight. It's weeks like these where I have three late nights in a row without the ability to do anything with my family or anything for relaxation that really wear on me. I'm already worn out from dealing with the kids all day and then I have to make dinner, get the kids to sleep and then go to work. I just don't know how much longer I can do that. And the more Brett and I talk about it, the more we would like the kids to be in a daycare/school type setting. If they are going to be away from me then they might as well have some structure, socialization, and learn a little something. If there was someone we knew who did in-home childcare in Lake City (wouldn't be a problem if we lived in Gainesville) then I would be up for it. But the thought of having only one adult (that I don't know well) with nobody else there to see what goes on is just not something I can handle. At least in a daycare/school setting there are more adults and more structure and all that. That being said, the fact that Brody is only 14 months old poses a problem. From what I've heard, there are a lot of places that only take kids two and up and I really want them both to go to the same place. Not only that but I only want (and can only pay for) two days a week right now. So I have to find a place that allows people to share hours, a place that takes kids under two, and another mom with two kids who needs childcare three days a week. I know this is a lot to ask, I just hope it's not impossible. Part of me thinks I might just need to suck it up and keep working at night like I've been doing for the last three years until Brody turns two in another ten months. That's another ten months of being exhausted but I know how quickly ten months can fly by. And then I think of yesterday ... what a day it was. Brett came home and took the boys out for a drive trying to get them to sleep while I stayed home and cooked dinner. See neither one of them took and nap and usually a drive will get them down. I had taken them for a drive before he got home and it didn't work so he tried again, which also didn't work. So we ate dinner and then we tried to get some work done while they laid on some blankets in the living room watching cartoons. See I'm trying to teach myself reinforced concrete design for the new project type I've taken on so Brett's helping me out a little. Good thing we kept all of our college textbooks because they've really come in handy lately. We don't use any concrete in the space industry, obviously, because it's so heavy. We're all about lightweight and composite materials so I never learned a thing about concrete in school. We did the usual steel beam analysis in strengths of materials but we never touched on the concrete stuff. So anyway, the kids wouldn't let it happen so I ended up playing with them trying to wear them out while Brett tried to figure out my plan of action on this new project. Poor guy comes home from working all day and then has to work more at night because the kids wouldn't let me work. I even skipped Yoga last night so I could get some work done and watch the space shuttle launch. Well it was too hazy to see the launch and the kids were crazy so obviously I should have just gone to Yoga. I don't know what was up with the kids but I couldn't get them to sleep until around eleven and then I ended up rocking myself to sleep along with them. (it might be that we didn't play outside for long yesterday since it was so freakin' hot ... thermometer on the porch read 102 and the one in the yard read 105) Then Brett woke me up around eleven-thirty and explained what he had learned while I'm sitting there fighting to stay awake and process and understand all this info on concrete design. Yikes! This is really getting ridiculous. So today we are both exhausted and I still have to finish that project tonight as well as get all the supplies ready for my kids art class tomorrow morning. Like I said, it's weeks like these where I think I need to find childcare sooner rather than later.