Do you see a trend here? Yep, I like dark earthy colors.
Friday, June 29, 2007
Thursday, June 28, 2007
Brett had a city council meeting to go to tonight so the boys and I went to the gym. They did really well in the childwatch. The woman watching the kiddos tonight told me that they were both very well behaved. That's my boys! :) I did some ab work and ran on the treadmill. I walked for a half mile to get good and warmed up and then I ran for two miles straight without stopping! Yay! Go me! I haven't been able to do that in a long time. I uesd to run a lot but I got away from it for quite a while. I'm really enjoying getting back into it. It feels great to exert myself like that and to sweat out all those toxins. Speaking of sweating, I thought I would sweat less today b/c I was on a treadmill in the a/c ... didn't happen. I am one sweat-producing machine when I run! (i know, yummy)
I've found the key for me is a good long walking warm up and good music on my mp3 player. I spent a while today loading more of our cds onto the computer so I could put a new playlist on my mp3 player and make some cd's for our beach trip and for my sectret pal. So glad I took the time to do that. I was getting sick of all the songs I had on there before. I'm in more of a rock phase now so my new playlist has Candlebox, Sister Hazel, Black Crowes, Live, Red Hot Chili Peppers, Evanescence, Linkin Park, Seether, Lenny Kravitz (of course), Daughtry, and a handful of fun pop/dance songs like Pussy Cat Dolls, Justin Timberlake and Christina Aguilera. New shoes and new music and I was rockin' and runnin'. Good stuff man, good stuff.
I think the thing i'm diggin' about getting into running again (besides the obvious health benefits) is the personal challenge. How far can I go this time? I'm going through a phase of seeking out new challenges in life. Can you tell? But mostly, i'm just tired of carrying this extra weight around and not feeling good about myself. I am losing weight though so i'm on the right track!
In knitting news, I finished the headwrap I was working on and it turned out quite nicely. Let's see if I can find the picture I took... well it looks like you're gonna have to wait. I didn't realize my memory stick wasn't in the camera when I took the pic so it's on the camera's internal memory and I don't see the usb cable for the camera. I'm sure it's around here somewhere but i'll find it later. Right now i'm going to bed.
On a blender note ... i've discovered my favorite juice so far and it is sooooo yummy. I use four ounces of water, one tomato, eight baby carrots, one stalk of celery, about five or six red grapes and some ice cubes. Use the "whole juice" cycle on the fancy dancy blender and you've got yourself a glass of yummy goodness.
Wednesday, June 27, 2007
Here's Houston swimming with his teacher Bridgette. She's been really great and has an amazing amount of patience to manage three two-year-olds in a pool at the same time. Brody loves to watch and keeps trying to crawl into the pool. It's a constant struggle to keep that boy from the edge of the pool while his brother swims. He crawls to the edge and turns around so he can back himself right into the pool. I doubt he would do it anymore if he found out what happens when mama actually lets him go over the edge. Hee hee ... but I wouldn't do that to my little munchkin.
Friday, June 22, 2007
|Your Learning Style: Energetic and Inspired|
You always find the words to express yourself, and there's hardly a class or subject you don't enjoy.
You Should Study:
|You Have Good Karma|
In general, you like to do the right thing when it comes to others.
Your caring personality really shines through.
Sure, you have your moments of weakness - and occasionally act out.
But, all in all, you're karma is good... even with those few dark spots.
Thursday, June 21, 2007
So here I sit, thinking of my aunt and uncle and my cousins ... knowing what lies ahead of them. Feeling helpless once again and overwhelmingly sad. What do I say to comfort them when I know what hell lies ahead of them? I'm sad for Ashley and Brian, that their dad will never see them get married or have kids or even graduate college .... for they are still so young. I'm sad for my Aunt Gail, that she will be left without her partner. I'm sad for Erika, that her son will lose his grandfather so early in life and that she will lose her father. I'm sad for my grandmother, because you just aren't supposed to outlive your children.
But mostly ... i'm just pissed off. I'm pissed off that this terrible disease continues to steal life away from those I love. Why is it that we live in a society with this supposedly wonderful "western medicine" yet we still can't fix this? If early detection is the key, then when are we going to get to a point at which everyone goes in for a full body scan each year to find this stuff early? Why is it that two people I love, within four years of eachother, weren't diagnosed until they had stage four lung cancer? Why is it that it takes several months to get a diagnosis yet as soon as they find it, they bring you in the very next day to make you even more ill than you were, in hopes of slowing things down.
When is this going to stop??? I have two grandparents I've never met, an aunt that I miss dearly, a mother-in-law who is missed more than I can express ... and now an uncle that i'm going to lose as well ... all because of this thing called "cancer". And maybe the worst part of it all is that I know this is not the end of the list. It's only time before the phone rings again with bad news on the other end. It's not an "if" but a "when". And how close to home will it hit next time?
... there's been another "shift in the matrix". I'm reminded to appreciate every little thing I have and to not let the little things get to me. I'm reminded to enjoy life, because you never know when it might be stolen away from you.
Wednesday, June 20, 2007
I don't have much to blog about today so i'll leave you with some quotes from a great book i'm reading ... Financial Peace Revisited by Dave Ramsey.
From Chapter 3: The Basics (a foundation)
"You must gain control over your money or the lack of it will forever control you."
When your priorities get off track, money will take command instantly because of its active principle. I love the old adage "Measure your wealth not by the things you have, but by the things for which you would not take money."
From Chapter 4: Understand the Spiritual Aspects of Money
There are those who believe that finance is merely an exact mathematical science. That is the way it is taught in the universities. In fact, finance is an exact mathematical science -- until a human touches it. Personal finance is who you are. The personal, philosophical, and emotional problems and strengths that you have will be reflected in your use of money. If you are very disciplined, you can be a good saver of money. If you are very selfish or self-centered, you will surround yourself with expensive toys that you cannot afford.
Monday, June 18, 2007
Apparently Brody was feeling his lack of sleep from last night. I just found him on the kitchen floor like this about an hour ago. He and Houston were playing in the living room while I was sitting here on the computer and I noticed it got really quiet. I went to see what was going on and this is what I found.
Friday, June 15, 2007
Brody wasn't quite as happy about dinner as Brett and I were. Unfortunately for Houston he fell asleep early and missed all the yumminess. I saved some for him for lunch today though.
Thursday, June 14, 2007
Brody's head circumference is in the 92nd percentile but his height is the 60th percentile and his weight is in the 30th percentile. So 70% of kids his age weigh more than he does. And he was 12 pounds at birth! Funny, huh? Houston was a big baby too but he never really slowed down. He's still a lot bigger than most kids his size. I guess little brother is going to truly be the little brother. Dr. Mas said that this is probably where he will level off at and will most likely stay a little smaller than average. She's not worried about his weight at all though because he looks really healthy. Some pediatricians put a lot of stock in those growth charts and i've had friends whose peds told them their kids were "failing to thrive" because of where there are on the growth chart, even though they look super healthy. Just another reason I love our doctor. She uses common sense and doesn't get her head stuck in the charts.
We had a good day on tuesday. We went to the doctor's office, which is in gainesville, and then went to the mall there to have the boys pictures taken. We had a great photographer and she got some of the best photos of the boys that i've ever had taken. We shared some chinese food in the food court and then went to the play area so the boys could wear themselves out before the drive home. It was a really good day and they behaved wonderfully and then slept all the way home.
I decided to continue knitting the "ugly socks" for two reasons. One, it's mindless stockinette stitch going round and round and round and takes absolutely no concentration thus leaving my mind free to ponder all of my work/school options. Two, my friend Joy gave me a new way to look at the ugliness of the sock and I decided it would be good to keep knitting for a bit and see what happens with the pattern that's appearing. Now i'm not saying the socks aren't ugly anymore but the pattern that's emerging is different than what I thought I was going to get so i'm glad I decided to put a little more time into it. I'm done with the cuff/leg part of the first sock and I started the cuff of the second sock last night. I decided to knit these two socks together instead of finishing one and then starting the other.
I got my Etsy shop up and running yesterday and posted my first skein of yarn. I still have some work to do on my shop appearance so i'm not sharing it with you all yet. I have to wait until my secret pal exchange is over anyway so as not to inadvertantly reveal myself a little too soon. I hope to get some of my baby tie-dye stuff up there today or tomorrow as well. I'm also working on a new colorway for a sock yarn geared towards men.
Back to the "i'm a spaz" thing. I've done a lot of thinking and researching and phone calls and emails and soul searching about this whole going back to school thing. Brett and I had a big heart to heart about the whole thing last night too over a bottle of wine and were up till sometime after 1am discussing my options. Have I said lately how much I love my husband? I really don't know what I would do without him here as my sounding board. And no matter what my latest and craziest idea is, he's always there to support me and to help me sort through things.
Here's where i'm at ... my biggest and most important thing in life is to be here for my boys. Some people may say I want to have my cake and eat it too but ya know what? I went through six and a half years of college for a reason. So I don't have to work my butt of just to make ends meet. So that I can have a good life. So that my family can have a good life. So that I can have the job I want to have. So i've reached deep down to figure out what exactly I want and here it is ... I want to be home with my kids. And when they go to school I want to drive them there and pick them up and talk to them about their day and help them with their homework and take them to soccer practice and whatever else they want to do. I want them to have a great childhood. I want us to have a great home and family life. I want to be able to take them on vacations and show them things like the Grand Canyon and the space centers and the mountains and the malibu coast and all that great stuff here in our wonderful country. I want to be able to send them to private school. I don't want someone else to raise my children and pick them up after school and take care of them over the summers. I'm their mom and I should be doing that. I'm not saying that everyone should do that. I'm just saying that I should. Now over the past two weeks i've come up with two ways in which this can happen.
Option 1: community college math teacher
Pros: I can make my own schedule, great pay for number of days worked, lots of time off that would mosly line up with the boys off time.
Cons: Four more years of college in which we will be more broke than we are now. Two years of undergrad after which there is absolutely no guarantee that I will get into grad school. Apparently the undergrad postpac classes I have to take will take me two years due to a certain sequence that you have to follow and each class only being offered once a year. Postbac is only allowed for 12 months so I would actually have to apply as a degree seeking student and get a bachelors in math before applying to grad school. I've been told more than once that the likelihood of getting into UF's math grad program is slim to none. My only other commutable option is UNF. That's two years of school and time away from the boys with no guarantee of being any better off than I am now. Also, if I do finish grad school I would most likely have to work as an adjunct for several years until a full time position is offered. I've had two different math professors refer to adjunct positions as "slave labor". So that would be four years of school to end up making under 20k a year until, hopefully, a full time position would be offered. That would mean no private school and definitley no vacations. I could make more by going back to teaching high school. If I didn't have kids I would feel much more positive about this math option and would just go for it but there are just too many places where this option could take a bad turn. I've worked too hard to get the degree I already have to set myself up for failure on round two.
Option 2: civil or structural engineer
Pros: Hey ... I'm already an engineer. Now I just have to add that civil or structural part. There are several ways for me to do this. College classes, training classes, teaching myself with Brett's textbooks and his help, and a combination of all these things. We know so many engineers around here and the civil and structural stuff is going to be around forever. It's also something that I can do no matter where we live. That's the problem with my being an aerospace engineer. It's so specialized that you pretty much work yourself right out of a job. There are plenty of engineers around here that I can work for on a contractor basis. That's what I do now for GTC's structural engineer but I could do a lot more if I learned some more about the field. I could go back to UF and get a civil engineering degree pretty quickly. Probably less than two years. Or I could just do a year of postbac work and take some of the classes that Brett thinks gave him the best real world knowledge. He thinks I could go to some continuing education training sessions like the ones engineering firms and DOT send their employees to and could learn what I need to. So I could do this and continue to work from home as I am now but would be able to take on a lot more work, especially when the boys start school. I'll have all day while they are in school to get my work done and with my laptop I could travel around to meet with clients and the engineers that I work for. And did I mention that i'm already an engineer? This option is actually causing me much less stress, costing much less money and providing more immediate and continued success and therefore a better life for us and our boys. And i'm really looking forward to learning some new things, which this would definitely provide. And we definitely wouldn't mind being back to having two engineers salaries either. Anyhow, the boys are growing up and Brody is getting to the point where he and Houston can play and entertain themselves for longer periods of time, giving me the ability to sit and get some work or some studying done. Another six months or so and they should be at a point where I can take on the HVAC work that is waiting for me.
Cons: Our eggs would still all be in the GTC basket, at least for a little while, which makes me a bit nervous but I will be learning things that allow me to go out and get work from other engineers soon enough.
Considering the size of the "con" section in the math option and the size of the "pro" section in the engineer option, I see where i'm headed. And i'm actually less stressed and more excited today than I have been in two weeks. :) Now I have to go to Brett's office and drag all those textbooks back to the house that I made him take there to get them out of my way.