I've been thinking about something lately and I thought i'd poll my audience on the topic. So please, think about this and post a comment with your answer.
What is/was the most difficult personal adjustment for you to make after entering mommyhood? (Or daddyhood for you guys.)
I'll post my answer as a comment to get you all started ...
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I've been thinking about this a lot lately and I may change my mind next week ... but right now my biggest struggle is not being able to have five minutes to myself to think, read, write, clean, knit or whatever ... whenever I want to. Everything I do revolves around these two sweet little boys. I no longer get to decide what I want to do and when. I have completely lost control of that ... and that, my friends, I believe is the root of my parenting frustrations. I know it is all a phase and it will pass. Older moms tell me that the kids will grow up "in the blink of an eye" in the grand scheme of things and I will miss these days. That's what I remind myself of when I get super frustrated. Like last night when it took me four hours to clean the shower. And I am not kidding one bit. Four hours! Because I had to stop about every square foot or so to change a diaper, get a drink, fix a toy, get a snack, kiss a boo-boo, rock to sleep, rock to sleep again, etc. That is my life. That is frustration. And that was all over trying to clean the shower. Imagine trying to do something that requires some thought or concentration. Forget about it!
ReplyDeleteI know it is because I am a stay-at-home mom (at work 24 hrs a day and the kids are here messing things up 24 hrs a day) of two very small children. I know that they will grow up faster than I want them to and that it will not always be this hard. I know this ... yet I still struggle. It is the bane of my existance at this point. Is it bad of me that i'm looking forward to my kids being a little older and little more self-sufficient? I'm not a clean freak but damn my house is a disaster. I need to clean. I can't keep myself from getting extremely frustrated at the fact that it will take me ALL DAY LONG to clean one room in the house.
Okay, i'm done venting for the day. Thanks for listening.
Celena,
ReplyDeleteDon't beat yourself up! Being a supermom is frustrating and you need to pat yourself on the back. You are a wonderful mother and wife. Try to keep that thought at the forefront of your day. Make it your mantra!
Maybe you could find someone from your mommy group who would be willing to watch them for a few hours a week. Stealing a few precious hours twice a week, (during naptime?) would really energize you. You could work on knitting, tie-dye and your other crafts that make you feel good.
If that doesn't work, maybe Brett could come home an hour early once a week, or go in an hour late...That way, you have something.
Best case, I bring Grandma up to you so she can visit. She'll love those kids to death! LOL!
Much Love!
Erika
Yeah, not having much time to myself is the biggest adjustment for me. I really love to be alone.
ReplyDeleteI think the biggest adjustment for me was also the lack of free time and time to myself. Before I got pregnant, I lost a bunch of weight and played tennis 3 or 4 times a week. I continued that trend until I was 32 weeks pregnant. After that I was too tired and too big. Well that seems to have continued. I am still too tired and too big (I gained back much of what I had lost).
ReplyDeleteSo for me, the lack of free time, being able to exercise regularly and feel good about myself have been the biggest adjustments.
I say all that, but at the same time I would not change a single thing, well I would but you know what I mean! I love being a mom more than anything else. I know this is just a short phase, until the next child comes along and then we start the vicious cycle all over again.
Now that the weather is getting warmer, I'm going to have to strike up a deal with patrck to get him to come home early so I can go out and play some. He's pretty good about giving me time to myself on the weekends, but we are usually so busy, that those times have become few and far between. The last time I had 4 hours to myself was New Years Day.
He's suppose to be taking Ryan to Tallahassee to visit his dad sometime in March, oh what a glorious weekend that will be.
Sandy